Friday, April 11, 2008
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Go Go Yaris!!!
hey folks...goodi morni...really beri tied up at work becos of some project...haven had much time to blog...jus did my mornin routine...checkin Jay's website...kaoz!! found something super cute...quite sure this will put a smile to my brother's face...cos he's drivin a YARIS...hahaha!
Jay & Karen - Yaris Car Show
Monday, April 7, 2008
To My Dearest Brother...
can't remember when was the last time i went to one of those chalets in East Coast...secondary school days? poly days? NS days? hmmm....so anyway...i was ther on Fri evening...together wif Kor...to attend a Birthday BBQ Party for Xiao Ying...Danny Boi's GF....worried there will not b enuf food for us...me and Kor decided to have our dinner first....at this Japanese Restaurant...good food...relatively ok pricing...bought some beer at 7-eleven thn headed straight to the chalet...
its the usual sort of gatherings u attend...wif many unfamiliar faces...everyone is jus amongst their own groups...the only persons we know is the hosts!!! this is gonna b one hell of a boring nite :( so its jus me and Kor entertaining ourselves...didnt bother much...we r quite used to keeping each other company....should b able to hang on for a few hours before we say our goodbyes...after the Bday gal cut her cake that is....since we have a few hours to burn...might as well do something...BBQ...started cookin some stuff....adding in charcoal....acting like real BBQ professionals....and before we know it....we r down to the final few chicken wings....just in time for cake cutting...had our share of the cake plus photo taking....thn dis huge group of ppl (Boi's colleagues from Shanghai Tang) decided to make a move...leaving behind his cousins....3 other frens...Kor and me!!
Kor and I started exchangin glances...sending out signals to each other...its telepathy they say...kinda know wat each other is thinkin...thn Danny Boi asked us to open the bottle of Martel...well ok...a few drinks isn't gonna stop us from going home...problem here is...we didn't jus stop wif a few drinks....an hour later we finished the whole bottle!!! OMG!! and started on another bottle....by the time we were almost done wif the 2nd bottle...we ran out of mixers...it was 2 plus thn...dun think we can make it home wif all the alcohol...Kor and I decided to stay for the nite...headed for the showers...thn went to bed...if u think tat's the end of the story...think again! couldn fall alseep...so we chatted thru the nite...maybe its becos we were super high...Kor started to pour his heart out...the things tat he said and did really stunned me! know u r very interested in wat he said...shhhh!!!! 这是不能说的秘密...haha :p
i remembered very clearly wat he said wat he did tat nite...every word....every action...known Kor for so many years now...never seen him like this before...never hear him pour out his sorrows before...his argument: cos he dun want the ppl around him to worry for him....so he rather choose to shoulder all the worries himself...bottling up all his stress and fustrations! despite the no. of times i insist he tell me....he never did! except for tat day....Kor i know tat i m part of ur fustration and stress....u mentioned tat i have every right to make mistakes becos i m younger...no matter wat mistakes i make...u will always forgive me...really sorry! i didnt know tat my past actions had such impact on u and left u wif such an impression...tat u had to suffer in silence...really sorry!!
before i end this update...i wan to say this..."Kor, all these years...i have never really cared bout how u feel cos i always take it for granted tat u dun bother anyway...until tat nite when i heard it from u...dun care whether u r drunk or not...but u "spilled the beans"...so now tat i am aware...i feel really bad....i m so so sorry!!! but believe me...back thn and now...i have never chosen him over u...cos the both of u r jus very different...one "was" my best fren and one is my Kor...how 2 choose? but back thn i spent more time wif him cos i tot u still have "Godfather" wif u whereas he had none...but who knows tat f@#kin "Godfather" of urs so damn greedy!!!! want best of both worlds....create HUGE havoc amongst all of us....telling tales....back stabbing us....i really hate this old man!! wish he can drop dead!!! he's the indirect cause to all our misery and sufferings! i learnt alot from this incident....lost my best fren....but i m really thankful to God tat i still have u...for so many years...the care and concern u have showered over me...i know and i m really grateful to u...now tat u r facing some problems in life...can u give me this chance to do the same? let me play my part as ur Di Di....can? u told me tat nite tat the only thing we didnt do was go thru proper ceremony...apart from this...u regarded me as ur real brother...so u must trust me...i will do whatever i can to help u get thru these obstacles...but will only be able to do it if you allow me into ur life...to go thru good and bad times together...isnt this what brothers are suppose to do? Kor, all this while...u handled things on ur own...this time round...pls let me handle it with u can? Kor, dun do anymore things for me...more importantly...pls dun do anything harmful to ur life anymore...it will only make me feel more guilty...only make me feel worse...u have already done more thn enuf for me...really *sob**sob*....."
call me when u r ready to talk....
Xiao Ying, Happy Bday again!!! Hope u enjoyed urself!!!
Cheers
its the usual sort of gatherings u attend...wif many unfamiliar faces...everyone is jus amongst their own groups...the only persons we know is the hosts!!! this is gonna b one hell of a boring nite :( so its jus me and Kor entertaining ourselves...didnt bother much...we r quite used to keeping each other company....should b able to hang on for a few hours before we say our goodbyes...after the Bday gal cut her cake that is....since we have a few hours to burn...might as well do something...BBQ...started cookin some stuff....adding in charcoal....acting like real BBQ professionals....and before we know it....we r down to the final few chicken wings....just in time for cake cutting...had our share of the cake plus photo taking....thn dis huge group of ppl (Boi's colleagues from Shanghai Tang) decided to make a move...leaving behind his cousins....3 other frens...Kor and me!!
Kor and I started exchangin glances...sending out signals to each other...its telepathy they say...kinda know wat each other is thinkin...thn Danny Boi asked us to open the bottle of Martel...well ok...a few drinks isn't gonna stop us from going home...problem here is...we didn't jus stop wif a few drinks....an hour later we finished the whole bottle!!! OMG!! and started on another bottle....by the time we were almost done wif the 2nd bottle...we ran out of mixers...it was 2 plus thn...dun think we can make it home wif all the alcohol...Kor and I decided to stay for the nite...headed for the showers...thn went to bed...if u think tat's the end of the story...think again! couldn fall alseep...so we chatted thru the nite...maybe its becos we were super high...Kor started to pour his heart out...the things tat he said and did really stunned me! know u r very interested in wat he said...shhhh!!!! 这是不能说的秘密...haha :p
i remembered very clearly wat he said wat he did tat nite...every word....every action...known Kor for so many years now...never seen him like this before...never hear him pour out his sorrows before...his argument: cos he dun want the ppl around him to worry for him....so he rather choose to shoulder all the worries himself...bottling up all his stress and fustrations! despite the no. of times i insist he tell me....he never did! except for tat day....Kor i know tat i m part of ur fustration and stress....u mentioned tat i have every right to make mistakes becos i m younger...no matter wat mistakes i make...u will always forgive me...really sorry! i didnt know tat my past actions had such impact on u and left u wif such an impression...tat u had to suffer in silence...really sorry!!
before i end this update...i wan to say this..."Kor, all these years...i have never really cared bout how u feel cos i always take it for granted tat u dun bother anyway...until tat nite when i heard it from u...dun care whether u r drunk or not...but u "spilled the beans"...so now tat i am aware...i feel really bad....i m so so sorry!!! but believe me...back thn and now...i have never chosen him over u...cos the both of u r jus very different...one "was" my best fren and one is my Kor...how 2 choose? but back thn i spent more time wif him cos i tot u still have "Godfather" wif u whereas he had none...but who knows tat f@#kin "Godfather" of urs so damn greedy!!!! want best of both worlds....create HUGE havoc amongst all of us....telling tales....back stabbing us....i really hate this old man!! wish he can drop dead!!! he's the indirect cause to all our misery and sufferings! i learnt alot from this incident....lost my best fren....but i m really thankful to God tat i still have u...for so many years...the care and concern u have showered over me...i know and i m really grateful to u...now tat u r facing some problems in life...can u give me this chance to do the same? let me play my part as ur Di Di....can? u told me tat nite tat the only thing we didnt do was go thru proper ceremony...apart from this...u regarded me as ur real brother...so u must trust me...i will do whatever i can to help u get thru these obstacles...but will only be able to do it if you allow me into ur life...to go thru good and bad times together...isnt this what brothers are suppose to do? Kor, all this while...u handled things on ur own...this time round...pls let me handle it with u can? Kor, dun do anymore things for me...more importantly...pls dun do anything harmful to ur life anymore...it will only make me feel more guilty...only make me feel worse...u have already done more thn enuf for me...really *sob**sob*....."
call me when u r ready to talk....
Xiao Ying, Happy Bday again!!! Hope u enjoyed urself!!!
Cheers
Friday, April 4, 2008
All Soul's Day (Ching Ming)
Qing Ming Jie (variant Ching Ming) is All Soul's Day for the Chinese. Qing Ming means "clear and bright", probably a reference to the weather at the time of the year of the festival - the third lunar month or early spring, usually on 5 April or 106 days after the Winter Solstice. It is a time to remember the dearly departed and to pay respect to one's deceased ancestors and family members. Because it reinforces the ethic of filial piety, Qing Ming is a major Chinese festival with many Chinese visiting the cemeteries of relatives. Offerings of food and drink are made; sometimes, joss money and paper images of houses, cars, servants, treasure chests are burnt at the graveside to ensure that the deceased has all that he needs in the other world. After prayers and prostrations, the food is gathered together and taken home to be consumed by the worshippers themselves. Qing Ming Jie (variant Ching Ming) is All Soul's Day for the Chinese. Qing Ming means "clear and bright", probably a reference to the weather at the time of the year of the festival - the third lunar month or early spring, usually on 5 April or 106 days after the Winter Solstice. It is a time to remember the dearly departed and to pay respect to one's deceased ancestors and family members. Because it reinforces the ethic of filial piety, Qing Ming is a major Chinese festival with many Chinese visiting the cemeteries of relatives.
Offerings of food and drink are made; sometimes, joss money and paper images of houses, cars, servants, treasure chests are burnt at the graveside to ensure that the deceased has all that he needs in the other world. After prayers and prostrations, the food is gathered together and taken home to be consumed by the worshippers themselves.
after dinner last evenin wif my parents and brother...we were in this shop selling offerings made to Gods and the departed...stuck there for almost an hour...amongst others who were probably there for the same reason...buying offerings for the departed since its Ching Ming...call me a freak...but i was totally amazed the paper items tat were sold in the shop...couldn resist buying some paper items for my ancestors...bought:
1. 1 set of LV wallet, belt, lighter, handphone and accessories for grandpa
2. 1 LV polo T for grandpa
3. 1 Osim Massage Chair for grandpa
4. 2 LV and 1 Gucci handbags for my 3 grandmas (cos my grandpa has 4 wives....hehe)
jus wanted to pamper my ancestors...hahaha...hope they like their gifts! really fascinating...OMG! LV shoes, laptop with DVD drive, playstation, latest pda phones and charger, egg rolls...shabu shabu...etc...really amazing stuff! mummy managed to stop me from buying the entire shop...haha...i mean....i m a shopoholic...
i miss grandpa! love u all! must bless me ok....:)
Offerings of food and drink are made; sometimes, joss money and paper images of houses, cars, servants, treasure chests are burnt at the graveside to ensure that the deceased has all that he needs in the other world. After prayers and prostrations, the food is gathered together and taken home to be consumed by the worshippers themselves.
after dinner last evenin wif my parents and brother...we were in this shop selling offerings made to Gods and the departed...stuck there for almost an hour...amongst others who were probably there for the same reason...buying offerings for the departed since its Ching Ming...call me a freak...but i was totally amazed the paper items tat were sold in the shop...couldn resist buying some paper items for my ancestors...bought:
1. 1 set of LV wallet, belt, lighter, handphone and accessories for grandpa
2. 1 LV polo T for grandpa
3. 1 Osim Massage Chair for grandpa
4. 2 LV and 1 Gucci handbags for my 3 grandmas (cos my grandpa has 4 wives....hehe)
jus wanted to pamper my ancestors...hahaha...hope they like their gifts! really fascinating...OMG! LV shoes, laptop with DVD drive, playstation, latest pda phones and charger, egg rolls...shabu shabu...etc...really amazing stuff! mummy managed to stop me from buying the entire shop...haha...i mean....i m a shopoholic...
i miss grandpa! love u all! must bless me ok....:)
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Sunshine after the Rain
Nick boy called me earlier...informin me there might be hope...his GF sent him an SMS dis mornin to give her time to sort things out. Meanwhile, asking him to take care of himself...not to do anything silly again...not to skip his meals....so sweeeeeet :p of cos....silly boy oso replied her wif super super long sms....read his SMS to me....very long winded....but very sincere...very touching indeed...and oso beri mushy....sent his "pokemon" kiss to her...i was askin him wad the hell is tat? he explained cos he never shave when he kissed her...therefore Poke-Mon...get it?? hahaha....he oso sent her a "goldfish" kiss....i assume its becos his eyes forever swollen due to lack of sleep...hahaha...okee...i knoe its kinda lame...
on one hand i m really glad he brightened up alot alot...on the other hand i m really afraid tat he builds his hopes too high and eventually if things dun work out (TOUCH WOOD)...he will be back to square one...hack! as long as he is happy now...Gambatek bro....u have my support all the way...no matter wad happens...u still have a brother behind u!!!!
so touched when he sent me this SMS..."Tks Bro. U r one guy i never regretted having in my life for as long as i live"....wah...damn mushy but sounds good :) hahaha....remember bro....if u ever need me...i m jus a phone call away!!!
Pls go and have lots and lots of rest now....take carez!
on one hand i m really glad he brightened up alot alot...on the other hand i m really afraid tat he builds his hopes too high and eventually if things dun work out (TOUCH WOOD)...he will be back to square one...hack! as long as he is happy now...Gambatek bro....u have my support all the way...no matter wad happens...u still have a brother behind u!!!!
so touched when he sent me this SMS..."Tks Bro. U r one guy i never regretted having in my life for as long as i live"....wah...damn mushy but sounds good :) hahaha....remember bro....if u ever need me...i m jus a phone call away!!!
Pls go and have lots and lots of rest now....take carez!
Will Be Here For You...ALWAYS!!!!
received a phone call last nite...from Nicholas...haven heard from him for months...it really felt good to hear his voice...missed u lots bro! asked me if i wanted to meet up...at 11plus?? hmmm...his voice sounded really strange...so i asked if he was drunk or something...apparently not...he broke up wif his GF and feeling super depressed...
known Nick since secondary school days...one year my junior...but we clicked really well...sleep over at each other's house...wrestle each other in bed...shared most of our stuff (we jus use each other's T-shirts, watches, zippo lighters like as if its our own...so much so tat dis dickhead sold off my porn thinkin it was his)...bump around...skip school...smoke like crazy...drink like there's no tommorrow....my parents loved him like their own...exclude the fact tat he finished most of the tibits in my kitchen...small guy wif a huge appetite...i mean he is barely up to my shoulder....but he can really eat!! we kinda stopped hanging out wif each other when we were in NS...had new frens...new hang outs...new hobbies...etc.etc. still kept in contact wif him but dun meet up as often...miss those days!
met him up after his phonecall...looked the same as before (used to say he look like andy hui)...still as cute and charming...a bit more dashing cos he's quite tanned now...but still as short.... haha!! he lost his smile though....looked really tired...still recovering from his break-up...still pinnin lots of hopes to reconcile but his GF jus refuses...can't share wif u ppl his story though...respect his privacy!! sorry peeps! he suggested to go for a ride...in my car...he drive...can i refuse? of cos not...he's my brother!! and hell yes...i trust him 101%...headed back to his place to pick up his GF's stuff (clothes and all)...wanted to return them to her....on our way to her place...gave her a call and realised tat she was out wif frens...so we jus went in circles in Geylang.. i was really worried bout him thn....his mind is everywhere....one moment he shows me his "slashed" wrist...i mean the freakin cut was so damn long...and it was all stiched up...he said he was pissed drunk when he cut himself...apparently the cut was so deep it cut into one of his arteries...ouch!!! next moment he started singing...tunning in to Class 95.0 Love Songs...how appropriate!! thn he stopped in one of the lanes...against traffic flow can!!! all becos he wanted to buy durians for his GF's mum...next moment...he started popping pills into his mouth...said it was to calm his nerves down....the look in his eyes...all dazed...like he has been possessed! man...wad is happening to my brother??
we headed to his GF's place...he wanted to wait for her to return...suspicious tat she was out wif some guy frens...we were sneakin around the void decks around her place...felt like we were stockers...it was around 12 plus when she came back in a Mercedez cabbie...he asked me to wait for him in the car...he will return her belongings...clarify some matters wif her...thn we will head home...i waited....and waited....and waited....so worried bout him....i was constantly peeping over some walls from a distance jus to see if he's ok...continued to wait ....and wait....and wait....till bout 2.40am...saw him walkin back to the car...still looking depressed....guess the talk didnt work out...jus as expected...they didnt reconcile....but guess he should be feeling better...well at least she didnt ignore him...
really very much wanted to accept his request to stay over at my place...i m sure my parents will be delighted to see him...and we can catch up on our good old times...but i had to work....so had to send him home....still very worried bout him though....wonder if he's really ok....now i m really very very sleepy....cos i slept at 4 plus...
dearest bro...if u r reading dis...be strong...some things r jus not within our control...as long as you have given ur best...thn u will not live wif regrets! whether she's meant for u eventually... fate will decide. pls dun do anything silly...i m really worried bout u...u r on medication...pls have more rest...i dun knoe how else to comfort u...but if u need a listening ear...i m always available...jus like always...!!!!
known Nick since secondary school days...one year my junior...but we clicked really well...sleep over at each other's house...wrestle each other in bed...shared most of our stuff (we jus use each other's T-shirts, watches, zippo lighters like as if its our own...so much so tat dis dickhead sold off my porn thinkin it was his)...bump around...skip school...smoke like crazy...drink like there's no tommorrow....my parents loved him like their own...exclude the fact tat he finished most of the tibits in my kitchen...small guy wif a huge appetite...i mean he is barely up to my shoulder....but he can really eat!! we kinda stopped hanging out wif each other when we were in NS...had new frens...new hang outs...new hobbies...etc.etc. still kept in contact wif him but dun meet up as often...miss those days!
met him up after his phonecall...looked the same as before (used to say he look like andy hui)...still as cute and charming...a bit more dashing cos he's quite tanned now...but still as short.... haha!! he lost his smile though....looked really tired...still recovering from his break-up...still pinnin lots of hopes to reconcile but his GF jus refuses...can't share wif u ppl his story though...respect his privacy!! sorry peeps! he suggested to go for a ride...in my car...he drive...can i refuse? of cos not...he's my brother!! and hell yes...i trust him 101%...headed back to his place to pick up his GF's stuff (clothes and all)...wanted to return them to her....on our way to her place...gave her a call and realised tat she was out wif frens...so we jus went in circles in Geylang.. i was really worried bout him thn....his mind is everywhere....one moment he shows me his "slashed" wrist...i mean the freakin cut was so damn long...and it was all stiched up...he said he was pissed drunk when he cut himself...apparently the cut was so deep it cut into one of his arteries...ouch!!! next moment he started singing...tunning in to Class 95.0 Love Songs...how appropriate!! thn he stopped in one of the lanes...against traffic flow can!!! all becos he wanted to buy durians for his GF's mum...next moment...he started popping pills into his mouth...said it was to calm his nerves down....the look in his eyes...all dazed...like he has been possessed! man...wad is happening to my brother??
we headed to his GF's place...he wanted to wait for her to return...suspicious tat she was out wif some guy frens...we were sneakin around the void decks around her place...felt like we were stockers...it was around 12 plus when she came back in a Mercedez cabbie...he asked me to wait for him in the car...he will return her belongings...clarify some matters wif her...thn we will head home...i waited....and waited....and waited....so worried bout him....i was constantly peeping over some walls from a distance jus to see if he's ok...continued to wait ....and wait....and wait....till bout 2.40am...saw him walkin back to the car...still looking depressed....guess the talk didnt work out...jus as expected...they didnt reconcile....but guess he should be feeling better...well at least she didnt ignore him...
really very much wanted to accept his request to stay over at my place...i m sure my parents will be delighted to see him...and we can catch up on our good old times...but i had to work....so had to send him home....still very worried bout him though....wonder if he's really ok....now i m really very very sleepy....cos i slept at 4 plus...
dearest bro...if u r reading dis...be strong...some things r jus not within our control...as long as you have given ur best...thn u will not live wif regrets! whether she's meant for u eventually... fate will decide. pls dun do anything silly...i m really worried bout u...u r on medication...pls have more rest...i dun knoe how else to comfort u...but if u need a listening ear...i m always available...jus like always...!!!!
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
DEPRESSION
for some reason...i have been hummin this tune...Christine Glass - My Love Will Take You Home...maybe its becos i m feelin so hurt now tat i m longing for someone to take me home...somethin happened over the weekends...cant get over the trauma...cant describe exactly how i feel...rather no words can describe my feelings right now...jus lost....lost my sleep...lost my hopes...lost confidence....lost my direction....lost my power to move on...i m stuck....in a very bad shape...apologies but its not convenient for me to relate the incident to you....even if i could...wouldn want to remind myself bout it.....
i caused quite a stir at home becos of this incident....dun wish to tok bout it anymore....dun knoe if i'll be in the mood to blog for the next few days...if u peeps do not hear from me...have a great weekend ahead...hope tat i will recover by this week so tat i can smile again....
Take carez!
i caused quite a stir at home becos of this incident....dun wish to tok bout it anymore....dun knoe if i'll be in the mood to blog for the next few days...if u peeps do not hear from me...have a great weekend ahead...hope tat i will recover by this week so tat i can smile again....
Take carez!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)